Have you had a stalker?

I was listening to Today FM this morning; Anton Savage is standing in for Ray D'Arcy this week. I missed the first part of the feature but very quickly picked up the gist of the conversation... a girl met a guy. How? Unfortunately I missed that, they exchanged numbers and he was now sending her something crazy, like 60 text messages a day. She was asking the show for advice on how to "get rid" of him.

Numerous other listeners started texting or calling the show to tell of their experiences. Either the same guy is texting half the women of Dublin or there are quite a few of these men out there. It reminded me of an experience one I had. I 'met' a guy internet dating, we started emailing for a while and he came across as pretty sane, so I gave him my mobile number, the first text was received the afternoon I gave him my number. I was driving home from work and the phone was sitting on the passenger seat...within a space of 7 minutes my phone beeped three times. All text messages were from him. The first one was an icebreaker, something funny...two minutes later he text again apologising for the first text and the next text was basically saying that he hoped I wasn't too annoyed with him.

My initial reaction was, "he's pathetic", then I thought, oh maybe he's nervous. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and I text back apologising for the delay in replying - all of 10 minutes - as I was driving.

Through email correspondence I had determined we had a lot in common; we worked in the same industry, both from the Country and living in the Big Smoke. I was trying to give him a chance and not be too hasty. To make a long story short, he turned into the male equivalent of a
bunny boiler! All this happened within days, so much so, we never actually met, I refused to go on a date with him. He was very clingy, ringing and texting non-stop. He'd ring, start an argument get frustrated as I'm not the argumentative type, he kept saying 'oh, you're annoyed with me' when I wasn't; he'd hang up on me and then spend the rest of the night, texting or email or IM-ing to try make-up!

I did the very "mature" thing and ignored his messages and calls. I know I should have been woman enough to be upfront. He eventually got the hint; it took the guts of a week or two though. He even tried to call me about 3 months later. But I am wise enough to keep numbers in my phone so I know when not to answer a call!

What is it that turns men needy and clingy like this? Insecurity? Is it a common thing?