He's just not that into you!!!

Have you read the book? Or more importantly seen the movie? If you do nothing else this year, it's a must! You'll sit there cringing throughout and think OMG I've done that, that, and said that...you'll realise how pathetic us girls can be around guys! I regularly go out for a drink with my BMF (best male friend); I have witnessed girls making fools of themselves around him, shamefully flirting with him. I haven't thought OMG that girl is a fool, I have actually turned to my MBF and said OMG I was a fool, I was pathetic and probably did everything I shouldn't have, thinking of one guy in particular that I was crazy about. At the time, I couldn't see what I was doing wrong, the more he messed me about, the more I liked him...it was only seeing someone else wearing my shoes that made me realise my mistakes and ultimately, he wasn't that into me!! It's a man's world...but that's another topic for another day!

Facebook Dating...Is it me who only attracts the freaks?

Since signing up to Facebook, I've had random "pokes", (Facebook term which means popping in to say hi!) from complete strangers of the opposite sex. In the early days I'd entertain them, curiosity and all that. Subsequently, I unknowingly ended up on "Are you interested", a Facebook dating application...the anticipation and excitement of flirting with complete strangers was fun. Eventually the flirting and numerous emails would lead to the long anticipated first date. That's where the fun ended! I use to ask myself, how does one girl attract so many freaks?!

First was the IT guy, who had asked me to email some photos, on receipt he told me I had sent him a virus but he'd the software to fix it. My knight in shining armour, you'd think...this boyo put remote logon software onto my laptop...it was only discovered when I asked a neighbour to take a look when my laptop was playing up! He recently contacted me regarding software to listen to the radio online...he got an outright NO! Can't you just do that from a station's homepage?!

Second came the guy who was using a photo of himself from ten or so years ago...we chatted a fair bit prior to arranging a first date...my intuition told me something just didn't add up, he mentioned how girls liked him before they met but gave him the brush off afterwards...I'm not into looks but honesty is paramount to me...this self confessed suited and booted rugby player looked like an obese recluse who hadn't left the house in 10 years.

The final straw was the offspring of a junkie (not his fault) who had married a woman 40 years his senior for an American visa! She was 70, he was in his late 20s at the time and he wondered why the US authorities thought this match made in heaven was staged!

Please tell me I'm not the only one who has experienced such horrific dates!! Company in misery and all that! lol xoxo

Have you a checklist, are you checking it twice?

If you're single, has anyone ever told you it's because you're too fussy or picky? Not necessarily a bad thing but are you looking for the right things in a man? Are the right attributes on your checklist? If you haven't a checklist, why not?

How will you know you've found Mr Right if you can't recognise him, i.e. if you don't know what you're looking for? And no, I'm not talking about 1. He must drive a big car and 2. Earn a six figure sum...mind you it would help (",) kidding!!! Here's food for thought...think about your ex's or male friends and the qualities you like about them, and write them down...e.g. good listener, considerate, educated, thoughtful etc., etc. that's the basis of your list...now when you meet a man who starts to tick boxes it will be the right boxes!! Happy hunting, Amber xoxo

How does one know... he's the one?

OK so you've met what you think is Mr Right! He ticks all the boxes and you know he's crazy about you...but when do you have "the conversation"?

It's probably the one question men dread the most..."So, dear...where do you see us going?" It's very possibly the one question to see them run for the hills...but it's the one question as the older we get, the more we need answered. Or is the fact we need it answered, is our answer i.e. he's not for you?

Do you just know, when you know?! Want to know your thoughts xoxo

Should we obey the 3 Month Rule?

Should we obey the 3 Month Rule (holding out on having sex)? If we don't will he judge us?

What are the pros and cons? Have you tried it? How did the man of the moment react when you broke the news? Was it easy to stick to it and did he appreciate your efforts, do you think?

Or have you your own rules? If so, please share!

Or do you just throw caution to the wind? How has it worked out for you?

Would you recommend holding off on having sex, going on past experiences good or bad? Food for thought.... xoxo

Broken Heart? Is getting under one man the means to getting over another?

Is getting under one man the means to getting over another? I'm not convinced...one night stands seem to make everything a hundred times worse! However, finding a man to fantasise about and cuddle up to (theorethically not liternally) in your dreams, may help the mending process and take your mind off "the unmentionable" whilst you're finding yourself again. What's your experience? Any advice for the broken hearted amongst us?

Is Facebook detrimental to new relationships?!

Go on, admit it, you've checked out his profile with a fine toothcomb! You've looked at every photo and scrutinised the ones where he's wrapped around some babe. You've even looked at the profiles of all his female friends and wondered what the connection is...ex, bestie, or colleague...I can see the blushes from here! I mean, who could resist the temptation? So, does Facebook increase our vulnerability? Does it reduce our trust in our men? Want to hear your thoughts!

Where does Mr Right hangout?

Have you thought about where the best place is to hangout with the hope of meeting Mr Right? The local versus some trendy bar in town? At work or by joining some club e.g. tennis or sailing?

Is Friday a better night than Saturday to go out on the town? Is there a science to it all, do you think?!

Some weekends I can be found out on the tiles on both a Friday and a Saturday night...all in the name of market research of course!!! (",)...I often feel a Friday night is better...more men around and less competition for some strange reason...is it that my counterparts rather spend all day Saturday to doll themselves up with the hope of attracting the opposite sex? Want to hear your thoughts... Amber xoxo

Is there a mid thirties "settling" movement going on...?

I know a lot of men, some of whom I would consider very close friends and the others acquaintances. The latter group I would regularly hangout with for fun but wouldn't share my life stories with and certainly wouldn't date!  Why? I hear you ask...Hmmm...how do I put this eloquently?  Aw...they would get up on a cracked plate!  Oh and discuss it in detail, even with me, despite my protests!!!

Ironically this bunch have found themselves in relationships...with the nicest of girls, all in their mid thirties...all independent, attractive and intelligent women.  My gal pals and I who know these boys inside out are standing there wondering what's the story? Are we missing something? These guys are not boyfriend material...so the question is...is there a movement out there, that girls find themselves in their mid-thirties and are settling for the sake of having a boyfriend? No matter what he's like?  Have we lost standards or are things that desperate...?